I dreamed about you last night. And it really bothers me right now. I feel guilty and regret at the same time. It's like the worst feeling, ever. So I really want to tell these things but I never got the chance to, so here I am…trying to tell you these things and hope that somehow, someday, you will find this blog and read this and know that this post, is about you.

At that time when I broke up with you, I told you that the reason was because you were so distant lately, and you were not there when I needed you the most, and I didn't see any value of our relationship. Well that was all true. But the main reason why I broke up with you was because, I couldn't stand a girl who wasn't me, had that much impact on you. Even if that was a bad impact. I could accept your bad habit, but that one thing, I couldn't accept. Even tho she was your longtime ex-girlfriend. You told me that everytime she contacted you, you felt angry, disgusted, frustrated, hatred, prayed that she could just leave you and me alone, and all of the other horrible things that's not worth repeating. And I didn't like it. How could she had that much impact on you to the point where you had to felt or said those horrible things? That wasn't you at all. I knew you since I was 16, you were not a saint, but you weren't that horrible either. I knew that she was you ex-girlfriend, but I didn't resent her. I was/am not that type of "unrealistic" girl who gets mad and talk nonsense about his boyfriend's ex. You know me that well.

So if you somehow still questioning my decision at that time, here's your answer. And I do apologize if in some way I've ever hurt you. And actually until now, I still care about you and hope that you're doing well.